It’s Hard Fighting Other People’s Delusions

I find dealing with a person’s perception of truth difficult to deal with.

Another person’s idea of truth is limited to their own perception, and this perception is influenced by personal bias.

It is also very frustrating to deal with them, most specially when things that are out of my control are involved. Technology fails, like internet connection or program crashing – my fault. Events not going as you have planned – my fault.

It pisses me even more when an unintentional event is being portrayed as something that I have intentionally done. No, I did not drop the call, the signal dropped and so the phone call was cut. No, that video call ending was not because I ended the call, it just stopped. Internet connection maybe?

Therefore, the burden of proof is always on me. I should always be prepared to show proof that I poor mobile connection or poor internet connection.

It is very exhausting.

One Week at A Time

Looking forward to a new episode each week has helped me get through life.

It’s a small think to look forward to, nothing grand nor fancy, but at least it gives me purpose.

I tried starting a NANOWRIMO entry. I got a generic story, but the details gives me writers block. No matter, I’ll see if I can at least flesh out an interesting story. I have always been a short story writer. Details that make up novels is far beyond my comprehension. Nevertheless, I try.

I was not able to do any inktober for 2022. It made me feel lost and empty. The most “painting” that I did was repainting this stone bird that my wife uses as a decoration in the plant box. I put in the effort I would with painting a mini figure – thin, but multiple coats of paint to avoid brush marks (though the concrete bird was not very smooth to begin with.)

My redbubble shop is also doing somewhat well with sticker sales. Well, that’s better than none. I still appreciate the support.

I hope you are all doing well.

Have a nice day!

We Are All Stories In the End

My circumstances have made me into a minimalist.

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I have found little interest in things anymore, and I value what I already have more. It’s not that I’m a true minimalist, no, far from it.

I do not have a safe place to store my “stuff.” If I display any of my collections, they are at risk of being at the receiving end of a tantrum. I don’t feel safe, and because of that, being a collector has lost its sense of importance.

The value of a collection is given by the collector and also those who have a similar appreciation as the collector. You know how the old adage goes? Another man’s trash is another man’s treasure? Well, it’s the same with collections, right? Another man’s toy collection is just a child’s playthings to another person.

If I don’t have a safe place to store my collection, nor a way to talk about my collection or even pass on my collection when I kick the proverbial bucket… what’s the point?

It feels empty. Pointless.

In the end, our possessions will be left behind, and we will be nothing more than dust beneath the ground and stories in other people’s memories.

Have a nice day!

Refreshing My Web Design Skills

I haven’t designed a website in years.

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WordPress.com is also a lazy way to designing. You just pick a template that you like, and you roll with it. Very little customization that you can do.

There was a time when I can build a website from scratch, but yeah, those were static websites, not dynamic like the ones we use for blogging.

The trend nowadays with website is that the content should be churned out regularly. You don’t need to manually code the page that will hold the content for your blog, the “blog system” will handle that for you.

I find web design and web development go hand and hand with each other.

Why the sudden need? Nothing in particular. I just want to get out of the slump that I am in. Give myself a distraction, and also polish up a skill.

Like I said, it has been years, and web technology has changed a lot!

Last time I tried web design was two or three years ago. I was supposed to design a website using wordpress for some kind of event or activity. That did not pan out. However, I still feel rusty regarding template building, so I want to study PHP, CSS and wordpress templates again.

Later!

Surviving

Life ain’t pleasant.

Read more: Surviving

Being on constant alert as the smallest move I make will most certainly be misinterpreted. Being viewed from a camera and being recorded and questioned later about the smallest action I made is not a pleasant experience.

Knowing that over a thousand photos of my face has been taken to analyze what I was doing, and what was happening around me based on the reflection on the glass pane behind me which is at an off angle because of the placement of the camera is both disturbing and disheartening. Shadows reflected on the glass, and how my eyes moved are basis for deduction.

Numb.

I try my best to numb myself from the experience I am going through. It’s hard to distract myself.

I learned that we can control what is going on around us with how we react to it. It’s difficult, to be frank.

Am I being gaslighted or is this genuinely a forgetfulness thing? I frankly can’t say, but it’s good to err on the side of caution, and protect myself.

Each of us have something going through, and it would seem that this is my hell to live through.

If you’re here reading this, thanks. I hope you have a nice day.

Later.

I Got COVID

It seems I got luck on my side this time when I tested positive for COVID.

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Our entire office was tested for COVID on August 3, 2022 when our boss’ test result returned that day with a positive result. I was not worried, but I was not thrilled of the thought, either. I had a slight sore throat that day, and there is a chance that I may have the virus.

Continue reading “I Got COVID”